How are you in pressure situations? Do you remain true to who you are? Or, do you kind of lose yourself? I sometimes find it difficult to remain true to who I am. I don’t like conflict. I have a tendency to just let the other side win. There’s a place for that. But, it is not always the best choice. How do I know when to stand or when to get out?
I don’t think there is a clear-cut answer to that question, but I do think there are principles we can work into our lives that will help us make the best choice in the heat of the moment. I gleaned these principles from watching one of my favorite movies “Anna and the King”. It’s based on Anna Leonowens move to Siam in the mid-1800s and the influence she had in that country. Although there is controversy surrounding the accuracy of the film, there are principles within the film worth looking at.
Anna is an Englishwoman, not only in a foreign culture, but in a culture where women are nothing. Yet, through it all, she remains Anna. How does one stay true to who they are, yet remain flexible, compassionate, and adaptive to the ever-changing environment of which they live?
Let me share some of the principles I gleaned from the film.
Remain truthful. In spite of the odds against you, even if it’s a whole culture against you, remain truthful. Truth can cause major conflict. Truth sometimes carries a high price. Remaining truthful keeps that foundation of solidity under you from which you are able to stand.
Be courageous. Here’s how Anna puts it, “While the customs here surprise and sometimes even frighten me, I must remember that I can show no fear-not to my own son, not to my students, and never to the king.” It’s not that there aren’t moments of being afraid, but it’s what you do with those moments. Being courageous requires trepidation. Let your courage show. Move ahead in spite of fear.
Choose your battles carefully. There’s a time to give in. There’s a time to stand. Before we are in the heat of the moment, take time to understand what’s important to you. What are the principles from which you cannot budge? Stand up for those. Be ready to fight for those, but don’t waste your time on the less important ones. Otherwise, as the saying goes, we may win the battle, but lose the war.
Understand your grid. A line in the movie says, “The people of Siam do not see the world as it is, but as they are.” Our experiences, our families, our growing up years-all shape how we view the world. Another person with different experiences, from a different family, from a different country will view the world differently. Is one right and the other wrong? Not necessarily. Together, we provide a broader and more accurate picture of the world.
Be strong, yet compassionate. The King describes Anna as “She speaks with the courage of a warrior, has the tenacity of a river but shows the compassion of a gentle surprise.” Strength involves compassion. Without compassion, strength quickly becomes brutal power.
Understand the impact of one life. Anna was one person, yet she changed forever the future of Siam. That’s the power of one life—fully lived, fully given. There is no one else in this world that can do what you can do. You may not be called to change a country, but you are called—called to live out who you are.
The next time you find your identity under pressure, consider this list:
- Remain truthful
- Be courageous
- Choose your battles carefully
- Understand your grid
- Be strong, yet compassionate
- Understand the impact of one life
May we remain true to who we are, even when we are under pressure.
Recommended Viewing
Anna and the King. There are a few intense scenes in the movie, but I love the story.
Sarah Plain and Tall Trilogy. Three videos that follow the story of a family trying to survive in the harsh environment of the Kansas plains in the early 1900s. Sarah, suddenly transplanted from the luxurious, green, beautiful coast of Maine to the harsh reality of dry and windy Kansas shows us how to remain true to who we are. We see the rest of the family doing the same as they struggle through the hard times and are committed to do life together.
26/06/2009 at 12:32 pm Permalink
Courage is the greatest of these, the foundation of all the others. Without courage we find ourselves afraid to do what is right. The peace of God, is a peace of courageously following our higher impulses regardless of our of the negative consequences for us. This courage is exemplified in Christ’s story; he courageously followed the a path that he knew would end in his painful death. What would Jesus Do? He would courageously follow the right path regardless of personal consequences for evryone.